Most often, perpetrators of sextortion use social media to “catfish” their victims, or pretend to be someone that they are not. Perpetrators often send friend/follow requests on social media platforms such as Instagram and Snapchat or dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge. Perpetrators will strike up conversation with compliments or by expressing interest in a romantic relationship. Perpetrators ask for nude images, often specifically asking for nude images or videos that include the victim’s face. Once the perpetrator has the nude images, they demand money, cryptocurrency, or gift cards. If the victim refuses or hesitates, the perpetrator threatens to expose the nude images, sometimes sending the names or usernames of the victim’s friends and family that they “intend” to send the images to.

Sextortion can also happen within relationships. This can include revenge porn, or nonconsensual intimate image abuse, which occurs when a person’s intimate photos or videos are released without consent by a previous sexual partner.

Sometimes, a person will feel afraid to leave a relationship because they know their partner has nude or explicit photos or video of them. In some cases, a partner threatens to release these if the relationship ends. In other cases, a person may fear this happening even if their partner has not made any such threats.

Though these scenarios do not contain a financial aspect, they still utilize sexuality and shame to wield abusive power and control tactics and can lead to devastating consequences for survivors.

• You receive a friend or follow request from someone you do not know in person
• You receive a friend or follow request from someone with no mutual friends or followers
• Someone hasn’t verified their identity via the platform (Tinder and Bumble both have identity verification programs)
• Frequent requests to move communication from one platform to another
• Immediate requests for nude images or videos
• Their profile has limited photos/information
• They’re pressuring you to do or send things you’re not comfortable with

• Your partner or ex refuses to surrender or destroy your intimate images when you ask them to do so
• Your partner or ex claims to have destroyed intimate images, but you have reason to suspect they have not done so
• Your partner makes “jokes” about releasing your explicit photos of videos
• Your partner uses coercion or threats in any other area of your relationship
• You frequently feel like you have no power in the relationship
• You experience any other unhealthy dynamics of power and control in the relationship”

• Exercise healthy skepticism when conversing with someone online, especially if it’s someone you have never met in person.
• Ask someone to verify their identity by asking them to send something specific within a short timeframe (for example: send me a photo of you grabbing your left ear with your right hand within 30 seconds or less).

• Stop communicating with the perpetrator immediately
• Take screenshots of the messages, especially where the perpetrator asked for money
• Do not send any money, gift cards, or financial information to the perpetrator
• Block the perpetrator and report their profile to the platform
• Secure your digital accounts by changing passwords and updating your privacy settings
• If someone is threatening to post your nude images online, https://stopncii.org/ is a website that creates ‘digital fingerprint’ from a nude image, and then shares the ‘fingerprint’, or ‘hash,’ with participating companies such as social media websites so they can help detect and remove the images from being shared online.
• If you feel comfortable doing so, connect with local resources such as:
  • CSU’s confidential Survivor Advocacy & Feminist Education Center
  • CSU’s Office of Title IX Programs & Gender Equity
  • CSU Police Department

• “How well do I know this person? Have I met them face-to-face?”
• “Does this person want to receive an intimate photo from me?” If so, ask yourself: “Why would this person ask me for an intimate photo?”
• “Do I trust this person to have an intimate photo of myself?”

• Once an image is sent, it’s out there, so be mindful of who you’re sending images to!
• Avoid sharing personal and identifying features – crop out faces, tattoos, piercings, and birthmarks. They already know you have a cute face!
• Try to avoid showing identifiable backgrounds, such as art or furniture that friends or family would know is yours. Neutral backgrounds are ideal.
• Turn off location data for your photos so a photo can’t be used to trace your location/address. This can be done in most phone settings.

• You need to get consent before sending a nude image or sexy message.
• Talk about boundaries before sending. Would you like the photo to be deleted after opening? Can they save the photo?
• Try asking: “Can I show you how turned on I am?” or “What do you want me to show you?” (maybe add some emojis, like the devil emoji)
• If someone sends you a photo, keep it to yourself. Sharing other people’s nude photos without consent is sexual exploitation.
• Consent is sexy!